Fine. Thanks to those who congratulated me whatsoever. T.T. But, Facebook-ing has really making me wanna puke. I feel bad right now, really really bad. I don't know why but serious very bad.
Hahaha. And now I just realised how going to college was nothing but just the sake of going. I am actually blaming myself, for showing off what I actually did to many those I knew. But, yeah, like always it fired me back. 3.5 is not enough my dear friends and parents. Even how many times, you wish me luck, you said it's okay, you tell me to be strong and the lists continue. I sort of giving up.
Facebook-ing is a good source of feeling bad about who you are, about what happened to you and etc. Seeing those people posting status about how triumph their lives are, how good they are at certain things, how they ramble about stuff but still making things work out perfectly and just telling how they are doing blissfully, could make you envy and jealous, and in turn, making you feel so bad about yourself. It happened to me like so many times. But, what am I still doing there?
Currently three of my friends, I knew did better. One got a four flat, and actually got an A+ for chemistry, meaning he actually got 90++. How terrific was that? I was with him when we both complaining about mathematics. We were both ranting about the bad mood before the day we will get to know the results and sorts, but looked now where we both at. The Earth and the sky. Congratulation to him, who got a four flat. He's a genius.
Semester 2 comes not with grace this time. I feel shattered to even know I will be going to that place I hate, and struggle harder. Emmm...what a luck and what a life. Just staring at the mathematics textbook already make me feel like throwing up. Where will I be with this awful results is nowhere but the devastation land.
>>>p/s: Feeling terrible after knowing you are nowhere closer to them the greatest. Feeling jaded when you realising that they are better but you couldn't be anywhere near like them. Sometimes I wish I never knew what is Facebook, what is blogging and what is desire and dreams. <<<
No comments:
Post a Comment