Exam which feels like a phantom

3rd week now and it feels 'okay' a bit compared to the previous weeks. Why eh? Mostly because I read several motivational comments on the blog, and maybe because I finally could adapt to the UiTM Shah Alam campus. I now know where the museum located, where the laboratory located, the computer lab and the lecture hall of course and find good place to eat around Cendekia. Except for one thing, I COULDN'T TOLERATE: THE SMELLY Shiteous TOILETS!

We bumiputeras are well pampered including us who are undertaking the pre-medicine course. Why must I say that? Well, first is because we joined this thing at the first place WITHOUT the need to pay for anything, just using our money to support on our food and stuff we wanna buy. Can you imagine, how lucky we are, seeing those lecturers cum doctors who are also specialists - and they are superbly nice to us - they gave us lecturers without us paying them any tuition fees? And it's so lucky to be having Dr Hisham, an Iraqi as my Physiology lecturer cum doctor in charge during Small Group Session (SGS). Plus, we are staying at 'moderately' furnished hostels with no fees whatsoever- even though has to bear the gross of the toilets and the smells from them that arouse especially at night.

Then before I go further down to the 'mumbling'- I must say now is a hazard zone. Zone to get all the facts and all the mechanisms inside the brain-those we already discussed of course. Because exam is looming. And it's frightening me off like crazy to think of OSPE -Objective Structural Practical Examination -whereby there're 10 stations to deal with- and we have to answer several practical and structural questions-either on anatomy or on laboratories work like measuring blood pressure or lungs volume and capacity. And this is all maybe- plus, tonnes to be read and not just read but to memorize! Then, also we are required to undergo 150 MCQ's together with 3 Short Answer Questions, which are compulsory to be answered. 

Asked one doctor named Dr Syed in the Anatomy Lab just now- regarding the examination. Should we the premed students just depends on the lecture notes or on the books? He said, PRIOR THE BOOKS. The lecture notes are like extra-simplest key points. After listening to the advice, I tried pushing myself to look for more diligence to open up those books and get some points from them. Scary.

But, Premed is also fun. When we got super roommates who heal and washed away all the crazy uneasy feelings on insecurities, when we are able to sit together during dining either it be lunches or dinners, when we are able to advice each other and etc. It's amazing to hear experiences from doctors cum lecturers here- how their life were during the housemanship, during the college years- all in all, they somehow gave inspiration to me- to note that No One Says Life is Easy. What makes it easy, is perseverance and lot of prayers and blessing from Allah and dear Parents.

Thanks for all the comments I received. And, I already been lectured by Mom last week, whereby she told me to rethink if I am really determined to be in this field of madness. Kalau premed pun tak tahan, apatah lagi real med school and real life as a doctor kan? For this 3rd week, I have somehow put in mind that to be rich, this is certainly not the route, but if there's more patience and hardworking together with perseverance and CONFIDENCE we can be specialists- and when we are already one of them- we could gain not just respect but TRUST. The eternal trusts from our patients and the community. Sprinkled too with LEISURE, whereby we can almost do whatever we want without having the need to be boss around. 

-fun going to Hospital Sungai Buloh-the place was a majestic, and a beauty of course. Imagine, how we can go doing roundings at the place, so conducive and comfy. And not as busy as those hospitals like HTAR or HKL. 

-met a neurologist-who is also very sarcastic and funny simultaneously-Dr Andrean Husin who happened to be our coordinator; Dr Rosfaizah's husband-who told me mostly doctors deal with satans compared to dealing with God. 0.0

-met Dr Faisal, a paeditrician- a good doctor who explains very well.

-met Dr Onkara, an opthalmologist (kutt, dah lupe, tehee:D)  ....who happened to be a bit strict, whereby she advised a group mate to do something with his wavy hair as she told us doctors should look boring not interesting. 

>>>p/s: gives strength to your servant dear Allah. To pass all these and be happy. And to Aini Najwa, hope your choice to reject USM is the best for you, Amin<<<

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