The Entity

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Kajang, Selangor, Malaysia
Assalamualaikum. Writing all the way from Belgaum, Karnataka, India. Missing Malaysia so much. But everything is just perfectly fine here. India makes people not just live, but SURVIVE. :)

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Sunday, 17 May 2009

I'm blurred

It had been a tough week. I will be remembering May 2009 as one of my worst month ever. First thing which made it worst is because of the exam which is yet to finish. I have got so many papers of long hours to deal with. I feel terrible. Still feeling like throwing up.

For my biology paper III, my biology teacher told me that I was answering it like a dumb, or in other word my answers are blurring. I don't know. I was not concentrating with my exam lately. There have been so many things inside the head, and yes, people never asked whether I need someone to let all of the things out. People just didn't care about me.

I used to love the examination weeks, because, no heavy bags and no lecturing from teachers about how bad we are in the specific subject. But, I must admit, this year its so dull. Perhaps because I am dealing with a proper examination, which I really NEED to excel. Getting ALL A1's are crucial since I need scholarship. I really need scholarship. I want to pursue in medicine, I don't want to be an English teacher, like what my dad wants me to be. Not a teacher dad, sorry!

Teacher's day which will be celebrated on the 29th make me more confusing, and started to blast. Its hard being in the high committee members of the prefects. This is due to the hard things that I need to do which I want to do, but basically just didn't have much time to do them. Like planning for any shows for teacher's day. I am not a type of person whom would be able to plan for some shows. I am not BETTY!!! Vanessa on the other hand kept pushing me to do a fashion show. Its okay if she could help with that, but she just good at talking and not at doing things. Sorry if you read this.

Again my head is full of problems regarding friends. I am loosing some of them every single day. I hate this. I want to be surrounded with people, I need friends. But, its too sad when they are only friends when we are in our laughters days. In my sorrows, who would ever want to be my friends. Chiam one day asked me if I would ever be mad if she wants to change her partner in badminton. And, I said no. Well, its the answer that will solve everything. If you don't want to play with me fine! I just hope you will find someone else better. T_T

Ah, and again its no use blogging, it is just a way of expressing my thoughts, my sorrows, my good news, my advice to the people out there, who never really exist in my life. Now, it feels a lot better. At least for this time of being. And I am glad I have Naqib. Thanks for being such a good buddy and tutor. Well, goodnight. Need to prepare for exam again...emmm

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